Thursday, February 11, 2010

"I wouldn't change a thing"

"Regret is insight that comes a day too late."

I hate it when people say they have "no regrets." I mean, really? Who doesn't have regrets?! I know I do. I wonder if people honestly mean that they regret nothing in their lives, or if that's just their way of coming to terms with the fact that there's nothing they can do about it. I'm not at all advocating that we should all sit around saying "what if," and "if only," ...but let's be honest, haven't we all?

I have regrets. There are plenty of days that I wish I could do-over. Things I wish I had said, things I wish I hadn't said, risks I wish I had taken. I guess I can somewhat understand the cliche response: "the mistakes I've made have made me the person I am, so I wouldn't change a thing." I mean, it is strange to think about where I would have ended up if I really were able to go back and change things. Like, if I had told my high school love how I really felt, would I be with my husband today? And if I had kissed that hot guy when I had the chance, would he have just made me feel like a fool the next day? (Probably.)

I guess some things are better left untouched.

Sure, we learn from our mistakes and missed opportunities, but that doesn't have to mean that we don't have regrets. I think everyone has regrets. They just don't want to admit them. Sometimes we're afraid to admit our mistakes because we think it says something about our present life. Like by admitting that we've taken wrong turns at some point, it means that we're upset where the path has lead us to. I'm thankful for my destination, but I would definitely change a few things about the journey if I could. And I think that's okay. Never do I want to be someone who lives in the past, who dwells on my mistakes, or who daydreams about "what might have been." Move on, let go, but be honest. Things in my life are great now, but if I could go back and spare myself some heartache, I would. Wouldn't you?

I have plenty of regrets.

For instance, I regret eating all the cookies I did today. Sure, they were sweetened with agave instead of sugar, but that doesn't mean it was okay for me to eat 10 of them.
....sigh, wish I could do that over.

"Make the most of your regrets; never smother your sorrow, but tend and cherish it till it comes to have a separate and integral interest. To regret deeply is to live afresh."
-Henry David Thoreau


  1. Isn't it amazing to think about all the seemingly little choices that brought us to where we are today? I am a huge fan of LOST, so I've been thinking a ton about destiny vs. free will and things like the bufferfly effect.

    I wonder if we could go back and change ONE thing, then how many other things would we unknowingly alter?

    (I'm so deep.)

    I loved this post... ohh, and I left you a follow up comment to your late-night comments on my post from yesterday! :)

  2. Very well said. We all do have regrets and maybes but you have to take them for what they are and move forward. Great post.

  3. I think everyone does have regrets... but what hurts us makes us stronger blah blah blah...

    Everything happens for a reason.

  4. i don't think there is any honest with himself or anyone else, person that does not have regrets. regrets are there to let us know we had taken a lesson.
    as for the past we must look at it with respect, no matter what happened it is what made us who we are today!